Are you emotionally intelligent?

things I thought about in my 10 minute meditation class

The app I use for instructor-led exercise for my bike, cardio, yoga, strength training, and stretching challenged users to do meditation for the entire month of May. I have never tried to practice meditation so this seemed like a good time to check it out for myself. It’s only the 17th and I have done 25 classes. I love it so much, that I committed to myself a daily practice. Just in case you have the app, my two favorite instructors are Ross Rayburn (he has a book too, Turning Inward: The Practice of Introversion for a Calm, Joyful, Authentic Life) and Aditi Shah

Today’s meditation was on peace. Ross told a story about a situation where he felt wronged by a stranger and was immediately reactive. He encouraged us to use the time of silence during our ten-minute meditation to reflect on sacrificing ego and the dopamine hit of being right for the sake of sharing peace through genuine apologies. Not an apology as a strategic move or a demonstration of moral superiority but a sincere act of peace.

This encouragement led me to meditate on a TikTok video I re-shared last night about emotional immaturity. Please view this list with an inward focus, don’t think of someone else:

Behaviors of people with low emotional intelligence or maturity

• lack of empathy

• criticism

• poor listening skills

• blaming others

• offending others

• poor coping skills

• repressing emotions

• correcting others

• talking negatively about others

• seeking validation from others in the form of gossip

• always self-focused

• relationship struggles

• difficulty managing stress and unexpected obstacles

• holding grudges

• inability to practice control

• withholding compliments

• never apologizing or giving verbal affirmations of forgiveness

• poor social skills

• avoiding emotional topics

• outbursts

• dislikes change/comfort in routine

• impulsive behavior

• lack of self-awareness in public spaces

My meditation this morning was gentle persuasion from the instructor, Ross, to be intentional about sacrificing ego, and being “right”, for the sake of peace in shared spaces. This manifests itself in so many ways and if you share communal space with other people (most of us do) there will be plenty of opportunity to put this into practice. In just ten minutes this morning, I have spent so much time thinking about my behavior toward others and ways I can be more intentional about promoting peace. Sometimes, that looks like just walking away, quietly. There is strength in control.

So emotional maturity looks like these behaviors:

• empathy

• encouragement

• listening

• taking ownership/accepting blame or taking accountability

• respecting others

• taking responsibility for coping

• sharing emotions

• patience

• building people up

• confidence and a healthy sense of self-esteem

• thinking about others

• pro-active in nurturing relationships

• advocating for personal mental health

• managing boundaries/generous assumption/ creating space for forgiveness

• exercises control

• gives compliments

• gives and receives forgiveness

• good social skills

• comfortable engaging in emotional topics

• manages expectations

• adaptability

• consistent behavior

• self-aware in public spaces

I wanted to share it this Friday and wish everyone a more peaceful weekend.

audreyabrothers

A post shared by @audreyabrothers

xx

Sadie